Written by Salina Jivani
No one ever steps into a relationship thinking that one day, they may be the victim of cheating or infidelity. It’s one of those things you simply can’t imagine happening to you, but unfortunately, people fall prey to cheaters all the time.
With Facebook and online apps making it easier than ever to mingle and meet, it’s no wonder all of a sudden finding your beau in the arms of another is an all too common, but still devastating, experience.
And maybe you’re aware of a slip or discrepancy on his part that took place years ago, but your partner has vowed since then that it’ll never, ever, ever happen again. And you believe him. But how can you tell whether he’s really cleaned up his act, or just preparing for an encore?
These three telltale signs reveal the characteristics of someone who is compelled to cheat…and more than just once.
Your relationship is an emotional roller coaster…and they love it
Most people are very content, even placid with having a smooth sailing, emotionally stable relationship. But run, run as fast as you can if you’re with someone who seems to thrive off the constant highs and lows of your relationship battles while you’re left to feel emotionally drained and exhausted. Why? Because people who enjoy these kinds of thrills (in this case, the thrill of making and breaking up) are usually those most susceptible to seeking the thrill of an affair or an extramarital relationship.
They have a fear of being lonely
No ones like feeling left out or alone, but cheaters often have an overwhelming fear of becoming lonely. So to create a sense of security, they keep their prospects open, seeking a constant supply of love and support from multiple people just in case one of their relationships do go awry. In their short sightedness, however, what they don’t realize is once they get caught, they’ll end up losing it all and in turn inviting the very loneliness they fear.
They’re not content
As humans, we always yearn for that one thing that life lacks—and for the most part, that’s normal. But cheaters cheat because a significant need—either emotional or physical—is not being met in their current relationship to the point where they desire its fulfillment. And so they seek that fulfillment elsewhere.
If you sense your partner is unhappy, try talking to them. If that still doesn’t resolve anything or help you gear your relationship in a more positive direction, consider stepping out.
Admitting your relationship is on the rocks or nearly over is difficult, particularly if you’re in a long-term commitment. But remember that allowing yourself to become prey to the destructive behaviors of a cheater can be more damaging and draining in the long haul. If you’re not sure you’re ready to break off your relationship, at least consider healthy ways to repair it, such as through counseling or therapy. And remember, any relationship that’s worth keeping takes time, patience and tons and tons of love.